An Open Letter to Adam Sandler
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Dear Adam Sandler,
Sit down, please. Why don't you slip into something more comfortable before I begin? Perhaps a nice coma would suffice. Now that you're all snug and warm, allow me to begin by saying I just finished watching your incredibly massive failure The Cobbler instead of going to see your latest box office smash Pixels, due to my current economic state that will last until next week. Unfortunately, The Cobbler proved to be no more effective than any of your previous attempts, and I fear for the trivia-filledWreck-It Ralph ripoff that you have just released, not only because of the critical reception, but also just because you aren't funny anymore. At all.